Jul
08
2011

The Drunkest I’ve Ever Been: Visit to the homeland

—Prez


I’ll be honest with you guys; this was a tough one to come up with. I don’t want to brag too much, but I’ve been quite drunk quite a few times. For every good story I came up with, I was promptly reminded of a different time where I was even drunker. After searching the dark recesses of my mind and contacting some drinking buddies, I realized that one story stands out like a wine-drinker at a dive bar, and it happened on my trip to the homeland a few years back.

Technically, I could make the argument that the entire three-week visit was the drunkest I have ever been, since I don’t recall a day when I wasn’t heavily enthusing with some cousin, uncle, or childhood friend. Seriously, it was 21 days of non-stop alcohol consumption, but one drunken blur of a night stands head and shoulders above the rest (and it wasn’t the wedding that was the genesis of the trip, that’s a story for later).
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Apr
08
2011

My First Time

—Prez

Before I recount the tale of my first time, let me first provide a little back-story. You may not be aware of this, but I was born and raised in Eastern Europe: the land of accordions, iron curtains, and vodka. The Double E is also a land that doesn’t simultaneously glorify and vilify drinking like America has a tendency to do. In the old country, enthusing is a part of normal day-to-day life. It’s simply in our blood. And as such I feel I should have some leeway when it comes to that pesky BAC limit—but I digress. Sure we have our problems with overly enthusiastic relatives and dangerously inebriated soccer hooligans, but there isn’t a big social stigma against drinking itself, and certainly not against enthusing at “disturbingly young” ages. I don’t remember there being an official drinking age, and if there was, it was certainly never enforced.

Asking me to recall my first time trying an alcoholic beverage is like me asking you to recall your first birthday party. I was simply too young to remember the very first time that the sweet nectar-of-the-gods touched my lips. I do recall my father/priest/grandma/doctor letting me try some of whatever they were drinking on multiple occasions in my extreme youth, so let’s just say it first happened when I was 4 and wrap up this part of the flashback.

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Aug
12
2010

Team building

—Prez

We had this team-building thing coming up at work. I’m not going to bore you with the details—nor compromise any identities—but let’s just say it involved going out into a body of water on waterborne vessels of some type, propelled by yours truly and his cohorts. Naturally, “BOOZE!” popped into my head the second I heard about this. I set out immediately on a complicated mission with several objectives.

First and foremost, I had to seek out the fellow drinkers who were going on the trip. This posed no great challenge. I don’t know what it is (and that’s part of the magic), but something deeper than our mutual love for that sweet, fermented, nectar-of-the-gods binds all Enthusiasts. We flocked to each other like birds migrating south for the winter, and without any hesitation, immediately decided that we would be inebriated at said-event.
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